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Home Poetry Humor

‘Goodbye, Sweetie’: A Poem on Sugar by Paul A. Freeman

April 12, 2024
in Humor, Poetry
A A
20

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Goodbye, Sweetie

Oh, devil-angel, Sugar! Your time’s done!
You rot my teeth, yet melt upon my tongue.
I’m forced to hide my black smile from the sun;
meantime, my exhalations smell like dung.
You cause us cardiovascular disease
and diabetes I and II, as well;
you pile the flesh upon our bones with ease
and pulverize our livers till they swell.
You’re bitter cocoa’s sweetheart, you’re adored
in candy bars and fizzy drinks which stokes
our bodies, building up a lethal hoard
of fat that causes heart attacks and strokes.
__Avoid this snow-white crystalline of death
__before it puffs you up and stays your breath.

First published in the Spectator magazine

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Paul A. Freeman is the author of Rumours of Ophir, a crime novel which was taught in Zimbabwean high schools and has been translated into German. In addition to having two novels, a children’s book and an 18,000-word narrative poem (Robin Hood and Friar Tuck: Zombie Killers!) commercially published, Paul is the author of hundreds of published short stories, poems and articles.

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Comments 20

  1. Roy Eugene Peterson says:
    1 year ago

    I would label this saccharine sweet satire, but that is too obvious. I feel for all those who have been affected by sugar. Your beautifully rhymed and well-worded poem really brings home the point of diseases that sugar has engendered. Fortunately, I am not one of those so affected. but I completely empathize with the victims.

    Reply
    • Paul A. Freeman says:
      1 year ago

      My grandfather had diabetes II, Roy. Its onset coincided with him arriving at visitors’ time at a London hospital to see his pregnant first wife, and when he gave her name, the ‘concierge’ on the door said, “Oh, she just died!” The sudden shock brought on diabetes, diagnosed by one of his brothers who noted his weight loss and continual thirst.

      Luckily, insulin injections were just becoming available, otherwise it would have been a death sentence.

      Thanks for commenting and recognising the impact of sugar on many folks’ lives.

      Reply
  2. James A. Tweedie says:
    1 year ago

    Paul,

    Refined sugar, empty carbohydrates, and saturated fats are the patented skull and crossbones of processed foods in general and the fast-food industry in particular. Two of the 50 richest men in the world are the two sons of the man who co-created the beverage Red Bull–which sells internationally by the billions.

    Entire populations (such as in Polynesia) are being decimated with diabetes as a result.

    Oh, how we love to kill ourselves with self-deluded “kindness.”

    In one way or another, your poem pokes us all in the eye.

    Reply
    • Paul A. Freeman says:
      1 year ago

      Personally, I’ve managed to get on track by cutting out as much sugar as possibly – but it’s in almost everything.

      Thanks for reading and commenting.

      Reply
  3. Mia says:
    1 year ago

    Perhaps this poem should be in every dentist’s waiting room. It is extremely good. Well done for making the point so well.
    But what can you do, when just as people want simplicity they also crave sugar. So let them have what they want. After all they have a choice. They have a choice as to whether to watch a violent film or an immoral one. It is up to them.
    The only thing that is not up to them is what to say.
    Well that makes sense doesn’t it?
    Is it any wonder that people are choosing death by sugar?
    Which reminds me, there is a passage in the bible that goes something like this
    this day I put before you life and death, choose life!
    The irony is that we do have a choice. We just don’t know how far the enemy goes to subvert that.

    Reply
    • Paul A. Freeman says:
      1 year ago

      Although we have a choice, a bit like with tobacco, sugar-related illnesses are crippling health systems.

      I remember somewhere in America they tried to introduce a sugar tax on companies producing sugary sodas. It didn’t work, though. Money talks!

      Thanks for reading and your thought-provoking comment, Mia.

      Reply
  4. jd says:
    1 year ago

    Excellent poem, Paul, and so true. I have been fortunate in having a strong immune system so am just beginning to take all of this seriously. Every day seems to bring a warning about a new well-entrenched food
    choice. Another good place for this poem would be on supermarket shelves.

    Reply
    • Paul A. Freeman says:
      1 year ago

      Alas, it wouldn’t be a good place for the supermarkets, nor the companies that produce cheap, sugar-laden foods.

      Thanks for reading and commenting, JD.

      Reply
  5. Phil S. Rogers says:
    1 year ago

    Paul; How about a poem going after processed foods, and all the terrible stuff they contain. Can be even more harmful than sugar to many people. Thank you for a meaningful poem.

    Reply
    • Paul Freeman says:
      1 year ago

      When I was at primary school, one girl suffered from hay fever and couldn’t go outside in summer. Now everyone seems to have allergies. Pollution? Processed foods? Time will tell.

      Thanks for reading and commenting, Phil.

      Reply
  6. Shamik Banerjee says:
    1 year ago

    An extremely funny poem with tactfully-inserted pieces of knowledge to spread awareness and possibly make a difference. There are so many lines that made me chuckle, but I guess the “dung” one’s my favourite. Although a disease that can be kept in check by using sugar-free tablets, controlled eating, cutting calories, etc., it shouldn’t be taken lightly at all. I personally believe this is one of your best, Mr. Freeman. Thank you so much!

    Reply
    • Paul A. Freeman says:
      1 year ago

      Thank you Shamik for your encouraging comments. I lived for years in the United Arab Emirates which has the highest incidence of diabetes. It really brought home how debilitating, prevalent and insidious the disease is.

      Reply
  7. Margaret Coats says:
    1 year ago

    “Bitter cocoa’s sweetheart.” Doesn’t that make a contrastingly troublous identification? Worthwhile topic in a treatment for today, Paul. It would have been different in the past, although the thing itself has only a few centuries of refining history (as far as I know). My answer is a diet high in nutritional value, which leaves sugar at zero. Thanks for confirming the idea!

    Reply
    • Paul A. Freeman says:
      1 year ago

      Thanks for reading and commenting, Margaret.

      Where I teach now, in Mauritania, they drink mint tea, numerous times a day, from tiny glass mugs that contain 50% sugar. Any chance of people stopping drinking this pancreas-punishing brew is stymied because its consumption is traditional. With refined sugar ever more available than more nutritional foods, diabetes levels are rocketing.

      Fortunately, time and education are kicking in and making a difference.

      Reply
  8. Carey Jobe says:
    1 year ago

    Paul–as poets must, you’ve definitely tapped into a universal human experience. A bittersweet reading experience for me, factoring in the regrets of past indulgence. Still, a delightful poem and beautifully crafted. Well done!

    Reply
    • Paul A. Freeman says:
      1 year ago

      Thanks for reading and commenting, Carey. I’m glad it touched you.

      Reply
  9. Daniel Kemper says:
    1 year ago

    A great little bit of satire. Kudos for where you are teaching btw. Sugar is in EVERYTHING. I’m keto these days, though fall off the wagon occasionally. So refined sugar free basically. What a difference to seeing the world.

    I wonder if you’ve read the book, “Sugar Blues”? Anyway, wanted to share that I decided to go sugar free for six weeks in college once. I mean totally. I had to change my brand of salt b/c most use dextrose as a flowing agent. Virtually all bread was out. Condiments, too– save mustard and soy sauce. I remember when I went off the diet. Had a bite of wonder bread. Tasted like angelfood cake. Weird. Memorable.

    That said, everyone should eat as they’re led. I’m not in favor of “The Big Gulp Laws,” etc. But testing and seeing with ones own eyes…

    Anyway, great satire! Looking for more–

    Reply
    • Paul A. Freeman says:
      1 year ago

      It is truly astonishing what foods sugar turns up in.

      I’ll get another satire in the works.

      Thanks for reading.

      Reply
  10. C.B. Anderson says:
    1 year ago

    I have a sweet tooth for poems that go against the grain, but a good brush will solve many an emerging dental problem. Carbohydrate metabolism is a different issue altogether.

    Reply
    • Paul A. Freeman says:
      1 year ago

      Thanks for reading and commenting, CB.

      Zero sugar doesn’t necessarily mean zero carbs, so I’m on a mission to fit into my Speedos for the summer – okay, swimming trunks.

      Reply

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