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A Ballade to Becoming
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I. Conceptio
You may have fame, be well to do,
And live beneath a constant sun;
You may attain all you pursue
And be a friend to everyone.
But, without fail, a time will come
When all your efforts come to naught
And all your luck has been outrun
—So, now, my boy, what’s your next thought?
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II. Contemplari
The sky has fallen, buckaroo.
You’re tempted now to just succumb.
But what would that say about you?
For now you have great depths to plumb!
Your suff’ring’s only just begun
Because this life, with hardship fraught,
Keeps hid a crown that could be won.
—So, now, my boy, what’s your next thought?
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III. Cognoscere
‘Tis time to learn what hitherto
Had seemed, to you, too finely-spun
And time to have that rendezvous
With your own conscience—one-to-one.
Your life till now? A scattergun
Of all that you ought not have sought,
But now you know what must be done
—So, now, my boy, what’s your next thought?
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IV. Committere
Alas, you know: Excuses? None.
This is a fate that you have bought.
But you’ve still someone to become
—So, now, young man, what’s your next thought?
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D.T. Holt is an inmate whose poetry has been accepted at literary journals such as Westward Quarterly Review, Poem, Blue Unicorn, Chiron Review, Caveat Lector, and HaightAshbury. He studied history, philosophy and religion in college.
D.T., I consider this four-part ballade extremely well done with great wording, rhythm, and rhyme. “Finely-spun” and “scattergun” were inspired words to use. This is a great innermost discussion with self while considering the future and realizing that there still is a crown out there for your taking. I was really impressed and inspired with your work.
Dear D.T,
Alas, if only the young could read and take heed! But most of us only learn these things by failures and experience.
As you point out, when the efforts come to naught and suffering is at hand, that is when you battle to become a person of substance.
I love the rhyme schemed and rhythm of this poem that contains great wisdom. Thank you.
Gigi
Congratulations, D.T., on a poem that manages to convey deep emotional insight while strictly bound within the highly disciplined form you have chosen for this piece. It’s actually quite wonderful — I’m especially impressed by your creative yet very sensitive choice of rhymes here, the four “C”s (from conception to commitment) listed as stanza headings, and — most subtly — the change from “my boy” to “young man” in the final repeat of the repetend. There is a strong sense of spiritual recovery and mental resolve documented in the thought progression here. You should be very proud of this piece. I think it’s top rate work. And very moving besides.
Nice. I really enjoy the classical framework around the modern language, the progression of thought, and the wisdom contained therein. Great job!
I, too, love both the content, and the continuous nature of the rhyme scheme, from “well to do” and “buckaroo”, to “hitherto” and “rendezvous”.
Truth, the need for wise discretion, and hope, are finley intermingled within these parts. One’s quest in life is not to question fate but always strive for the next robust plan. The first is impossible to predict but the latter is doable and when executed perfectly, even fate remains in shock. Beautiful piece, strong notion, and beautifully delivered. Thank you, D.T. and I hope you’re in good health.
Welcome back, Mr. Holt. In this your fourth appearance here, you offer a sophisticated contemporary example of the ballade. It’s time for this form to be listed as one of the site’s categories, as we have a number of good ones.
This one clearly outlines the process of “becoming” that is its subject. Latin headings for stanzas and envoi contrast with the provocative colloquial address to a person with potential he needs to consider and put into action. The addressee has come to a point where he must either suffer to make more of himself, or succumb to fate he has bought by bad decisions. He receives repeated encouragement about the crown to be won, about having knowledge of what he should do, and about the promise of gaining a more distinguished identity. The speaker also hammers in the point that thought will be the defining characteristic of the future. The person addressed, in order to become someone greater, must guide himself by his thinking, and no longer allow himself to be formed by circumstances to which he merely succumbs.
The quality of this poem, Mr. Holt, shows that you have taken it upon yourself to become an accomplished poet with a weighty theme and skillful use of a difficult lyric form. This is a work favorable to the 21st century revival of the ballade. That was hoped for and called for by the French poet and critic Jacques Roubaud. You help show that the revival can take place in English as well as in French. Excellent work!
Too late for most of us, but the advice contained within this Ballade may well be timely for others.
Thanks for the read, DT.
Thank you all for your very perceptive, informative, and encouraging comments. For those of you who may not know, I am currently incarcerated and am relaying this message (via the telephone) through my very patient mother. While I would love nothing more than to be able to respond to each of you individually, it is impractical given the time limitations of my phone calls.
I would, however, like to pose a request to the community of writers at SCP: Over the last year I have spent a considerable amount of time writing a memoir of my incarceration, titled “Up the River: finding humanity in an American prison.” The writing of the book hasn’t always been easy, but it has enabled me to work through the tangled landscape of prison life and to direct my restless energy into a pursuit both positive and cathartic.
In its current state, the manuscript stands at 350 typed double-spaced pages.
I would like to think the narrative arc is well-conceived, the message contained deliberate, and written in an engaging quality.
Now comes my somewhat plaintive request of all of you: I am dearly in need of any good-natured fellow writer(s) out there who might be willing to serve as beta readers for this manuscript. If anyone out there is amenable, I understand that what I am asking may pose a considerable demand upon your time – and, while I am not currently in a position to compensate you for your time, I can assure you that I will express immense gratitude and prominently acknowledge your assistance when the book goes to press.
But I must warn you all: Because this is a book about prison life, it does deal with some thorny subject matter that may seem indelicate to some readers. Likewise, some of the dialogue – though true to life – may at times be disagreeable to those of a more sensitive disposition.
All that being said, I would be extraordinarily grateful to anyone out there who might be willing to advise a young incarcerated writer in his efforts to emend his first prose manuscript. If anyone at SCP is favorably inclined, please contact Evan Mantyk for my mother’s email address. Once contact is established, she will promptly forward the manuscript via email.
If I have offended anyone by using this platform to make such a request, please know that causing offense is not my intention.
Thank you again, Mr. Peterson, Ms. Ryan, Mr. Yapko, Yael, Ms. Erlandson, Mr. Banerjee, and Ms. Coats, for your thoughtful, incisive words. Your kindness is truly undeserved.
Dear Mr. Holt — the kindness is indeed deserved. And honestly earned. I’ve written to Evan concerning your request.
I can scarcely add to the foregoing comments, other than to say that I greatly enjoyed this poem, respect the unique challenges which must have been posed in crafting it, and wish you the best of luck moving forward and in all of your next thoughts.
“A Ballade to Becoming” is a privilege and a pleasure to read. Your words shine. Mr. Holt, I wish you every success with your book.
My favorite part of this poem is the “refrain” if you will.
—So, now, my boy, what’s your next thought?
I like that it plays as both an address to an imagined reader and also a self-challenge. Get busy living or get busy dying, right?