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Home Poetry Culture

A Poem with a Glossary: ‘The Kakistocracy’ by Phil S. Rogers

January 21, 2024
in Culture, Humor, Poetry
A A
18
WASHINGTON, DC - HANDOUT: "MEN READING," by Joseph Christian Leyendecker. Oil on canvas, 1914. Stretcher: 48.3 x 99.1cm (19 x 39"), Frame: 66.7 x 116.8 x 7.6cm (26 1/4 x 46 x 3"). (Photo courtesy Archives of American Illustrators Gallery, NYC; copyright 2010 American Illustrators Gallery, NYC/Smithsonian)

WASHINGTON, DC - HANDOUT: "MEN READING," by Joseph Christian Leyendecker. Oil on canvas, 1914. Stretcher: 48.3 x 99.1cm (19 x 39"), Frame: 66.7 x 116.8 x 7.6cm (26 1/4 x 46 x 3"). (Photo courtesy Archives of American Illustrators Gallery, NYC; copyright 2010 American Illustrators Gallery, NYC/Smithsonian)

.

The Kakistocracy

Does the news give you malneirophrenia,
__but you’ve not been to sleep?
Do you galumph all day around the house,
__your mind in sorrows deep?

Do politicians bring on crapulence,
__but you’ve not had a drink?
Is it those ultracrepidarians
__who make you doublethink?

All the solipsist hacks and shady shysters,
__they use falsiloquence.
Their prattle is but an obliquity,
__they are a pestilence.

There is no need to feel lugubrious,
__or bend your head down low
over their sesquipedalian harangues.
__It’s all a circus show.

Their actions often are so scrofulous
__you’ll crave a bloody mary,
but common sense is all we really need—
__and Webster’s dictionary.

.

.

kakistocracy— A government led by the worst, least qualified, or most unscrupulous people.
malneirophrenia—A feeling of unease or discomfort after waking up from a nightmare.
galumph—To move around heavily or clumsily.
crapulence—Sickness caused by excessive drinking.
ultracrepidarians—People who talk or give opinions beyond their knowledge or expertise.
doublethink—believing two contradictory ideas at the same time.
solipsist—A self absorbed person with an ignorance of the views or needs of others.
falsiloquence—deceitful speech
obliquity—Deviation from proper moral conduct or thought.
lugubrious—Mournful or gloomy.
sesquipedalian—A person who uses long words.
scrofulous—Morally tainted.

.

.

Phil S. Rogers is a sixth generation Vermonter, age 72, now retired, and living in Texas. He served in the United States Air Force and had a career in real estate and banking.  He previously published Everlasting Glory, a historical work that tells the story of each of the men from Vermont that was awarded the Congressional Medal of Honor during the Civil War.

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Comments 18

  1. James Sale says:
    2 years ago

    Ha ha: ultracrepidarians is a wonderful and necessary word since we meet them all the time, everywhere; but especially in poetry where anyone with no experience, no knowledge and no insight thinks they can express an opinion on the sublime subject. Of course, they can ‘express’ (though usually inanely) it, but all that does is to reveal their manifest limitations. Love that word. Thanks for reminding me of it.

    Reply
    • Phil S. Rogers says:
      2 years ago

      James;
      It was also my favorite word in the poem, so unusual and so descriptive. I am glad I could start your day with a laugh.

      Reply
  2. Roy Eugene Peterson says:
    2 years ago

    That is a splendiferous display of acrimonial eloquence. Thank goodness for the glossary! Clever and intriguing while skewering that which should be lambasted!

    Reply
    • Phil S. Rogers says:
      2 years ago

      Roy;
      You have started my day with a laugh. I thank you for your splendiferous comment this morning. It was fun to write.

      Reply
  3. Joseph S. Salemi says:
    2 years ago

    We most definitely live in a Kakistocracy today. And it’s not just in government. It also is in Big Business.

    Do you think the Bud-Lite fiasco with that trannie freak Dylan Mulvaney was something rare and exceptional?

    The CEO of United Airlines has publicly stated that the policy of his company now is to hire purely on the basis of gender and skin color, and that his goal is to reduce the number of white males in United Airlines (in both air crews and ground staff) to a small percentage.

    This CEO is also a public transvestite and a performing drag queen (you can see him on YouTube).

    Not since the insane emperor Caligula appointed his favorite horse as a Roman Consul has anything like this been thinkable in the West.

    NOTE: I would strongly advise against taking any flights on United Airlines, at least not without your own parachute.

    Reply
    • Phil S. Rogers says:
      2 years ago

      Joseph;
      I agree with you 100% about big business, and that includes Wall Street. To them, it is all a game as they believe they are so much more intelligent than the average person. Can we blame our colleges and universities?

      Reply
  4. Cheryl Corey says:
    2 years ago

    Phil, your poem is terrific. Noah Webster’s dictionary took twenty-six years to complete. The man was a genius, who was only 16 yrs. old when he entered Yale. One of the greatest gifts that I ever received as a teenager was a collegiate dictionary, which I still own.

    Reply
    • Phil S. Rogers says:
      2 years ago

      Thank you Cheryl. It was a fun poem to write, and I certainly used Webster’s dictionary. The idea came when I saw the word, malneirophrenia, and had to look up the meaning.

      Reply
  5. Mike Bryant says:
    2 years ago

    I really love this poem and its exposition of the truth. The glossary saved me lots of time! I’m afraid that things are much worse than anyone knows, and they have been for far too long.
    It’s probably time to defund most of the three-letter agencies… I can think of plenty of four letter adjectives to describe them.

    https://www.thegatewaypundit.com/2024/01/judge-orders-release-last-defendant-newburgh-four-case/

    Reply
    • Cheryl Corey says:
      2 years ago

      It’s great to see that you are also a Gateway Pundit reader. It’s one of my go-to sources for real news, and where I first learned about the Iranian woman, Roya, who inspired my poem. I never would have heard about it otherwise.

      Reply
      • Mike Bryant says:
        2 years ago

        Yep Cheryl, the Gateway Pundit is what journalism used to be all about.

        Reply
  6. Phil S. Rogers says:
    2 years ago

    Thank you Mike for your nice comment. I agree, things are much worse than most people realize, and some people do see what is going on, but refuse to accept it as reality. Yes, the three letter agencies should go, hoping it is not too late.

    Reply
  7. Mia says:
    2 years ago

    I absolutely love this poem,
    Somehow after reading it I find I am no longer quite so lugubrious.
    It has truly helped with the malneirophrenia I seem to experience all the time- except I can’t wake up from it.
    Thank you for highlighting these beautiful words in such an enjoyable way.
    The only word I am a little disappointed with is crapulence as I think it should mean the sickness of excessive arrogance; it is perfect for it surely.
    As it is I think it is wasted..

    Reply
  8. jd says:
    2 years ago

    Very clever and true.

    Reply
  9. C.B. Anderson says:
    2 years ago

    I like watching you play with words, Phil, but the greater pleasure is seeing, in my mind’s eye, you play with concepts and ideas.

    What’s especially funny to me is that decades ago, when Michael Dukakis was the Governor of Massachusetts, one local writer posted an article the subject of which was the Duke’s style of governance. He called it Dukakistocracy. Along the way, the author explained the etymology of the kaka/caca lexical root.

    Reply
    • Phil S. Rogers says:
      2 years ago

      Mr. Anderson;

      Thank you for the nice compliment, the poem was fun to write
      Coming from Vermont, I remember Dukakis well, but do not remember that particular piece on him. I would guess it was a writer from the more conservative Boston Herald and not the liberal GLOB as we used to call the Boston Globe.

      Reply
  10. Warren Bonham says:
    2 years ago

    I knew 2 of the words in your glossary but have added the rest to my arsenal and will look to deploy them at appropriate (and inappropriate) moments in the future. Thanks for the educational and entertaining read.

    Reply
    • Phil S. Rogers says:
      2 years ago

      Warren;
      How often do we search for just the right word, to express how we feel, make a point, use satire or humor?

      Reply

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