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Not So Grand Poo-bah
Middle brother with lesser brain,
Descended from the killer Cain.
More grasping man you never saw,
Believes he is the Grand Poo-bah.
He flew down south to get his Dad,
But he was not a thoughtful lad;
Gained the Will through sheer chutzpah,
Controls it all now says the law.
His Stepmom with her mind so small,
She chose the greediest one of all.
And furthermore so there’s no doubt,
Made sure step-daughter was left out.
But Poo-bah left Stepmom behind,
And some would say that was not kind.
With no more husband at her side
And none to love her, so she died.
So now Grand Poo-bah calls the shots,
On spending money and there’s lots.
The Will’s a secret, the lawyer too,
The other heirs have naught to do.
But one fine day, all will be well:
To get more cash his soul he’ll sell;
We’ll all applaud the smoky smell
As Poo-bah slowly burns in hell.
.
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Frank Rable is a poet living in Pennsylvania.
What a startling fable for adults, Frank! The Poo-bah’s acts are commonplace. Who wouldn’t prevail at legal shenanigans to get the inheritance that should belong to him anyway? There’s no reason to consider persons so distantly related as stepmother or half-sister. And Stepmom herself gives the example by small-minded choice of the “greediest one of all”–namely, self. All for money, including the ultimate sale of one’s soul. It happens every day and hour. But hell? No one thinks of that, though when a death occurs, others may be quite willing to remember the evil and applaud the smell. Now to whom might this amusing tale apply?
Myself, I could say, as I often suggest amendment to others. The one I propose to you, Frank, is to change line 3. It reads better if you say either “Most grasping man you ever saw” or “More grasping man you never saw.” If you think either is an improvement, just tell moderator Mike which one right here in your reply box, and he can change the poem as you wish. It is a cute acute story!
Before reading Margaret’s comments, I had the same thought about “most” being better than “more” grasping.
Thank you for looking over my poem Roy.
As to the “most” versus “more” choice, I choose “more”. This was my reasoning:
When I say “A more grasping man you never saw” (same as “You never saw a more grasping man”) I make a comparative statement that says he is more grasping than anyone you may have seen, met, or of whom you have become aware.
To say “The most grasping man you ever saw” states an absolute, that he has no equal in piggishness upon the entire earth. And while this may be true, I thought the charitable course was to leave a little doubt.
It’s only semantics really, but I also liked how “A more grasping man you never saw” sounded to me as I read the poem aloud.
I sense that there is a personal backstory to this poem. A rapacious relative manipulates a doting and dotty old lady so as to get himself made executor of a will, and makes off with money, property, and the house, to the exclusion of everyone else.
You are correct sir. And in this fictitious drama, the once tight family of three siblings breaks in two. It would be unwise to reveal the twists and turns of this sad tale. Suffice it to say that there was heartbreak and betrayal. And a hope that one day a higher power would restore balance to this small ledge in the universe.
A humble poet can do naught but apply the balm of humor to the ouchy parts, made so by unbridled cupidity. This was the purpose of the poem as conceived.