‘The Lilliputians Confront Elon Musk’ and Other Poetry by Warren Bonham

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The Lilliputians Confront Elon Musk

One giant has thoughts that are new and transcendent,
It’s clearly a sign that he’s too independent.
He claims that he’s bringing electrification
of cars, and affordable space exploration.

It’s right that we fear disingenuous giants
since we can’t be certain of their full compliance.
They pose a great danger to us Lilliputians,
so we implement our time-tested solutions.

At first, we’ll engage in some simple name-calling,
which works best with names that are really appalling.
Our media friends help relentlessly batter
the giant since they know that truth doesn’t matter.

We hope that name-calling will work to retrain him
but if it does not, then we have to restrain him.
Experience shows the best means of containment
for giants is typically legal arraignment.

We have a large cadre of Lilliput judges
and worked to make sure we found each judge who fudges
what’s written quite plainly in our constitution.
Each one loves injunctions and harsh persecution.

Our spies give alerts when thought crimes are committed,
which we cancel since such thoughts can’t be permitted.
For Lilliput’s sake, we must crack down with zeal on
all giants, especially that one named Elon.

We’d not found a thing we could not cut a deal on
until we found out we could not pressure Elon.
He doesn’t care which Lilliputian he stresses,
and Doesn’t Oblige Governmental Excesses.

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Tyree The Cannibal

Tyree Smith admitted to killing a man with a hatchet in 2011,
and then eating parts of his body while sipping saki. Tyree
was found not guilty by reason of insanity, but was committed
to spend 60 years in a psychiatric hospital. He was granted
“conditional release” on February 22, 2025.

We have one thing in common, we all fear the specter
of killers who eat us, like Hannibal Lecter.
In twenty-eleven, a man was discovered
and parts of his body were never recovered.
That man closed his door, but perhaps didn’t latch it,
so Tyree Smith entered and struck with his hatchet,
then ate brains and eyeballs that he paired with saki,
perhaps he had flavored them with teriyaki?

The Court ruled he couldn’t make rational choices.
He couldn’t not listen to his inner voices.
Not guilty, but still, sixty years of confinement
with treatments to fix Tyree’s mental alignment
seemed like an imperfect, but alright conclusion.
At least we’d sleep well with Tyree in seclusion.
Connecticut doctors have done what’s amazing,
and led Tyree down the new trail they’ve been blazing.

The Board’s fully certain they’re done with his healing.
They’ve banished the demons with which he was dealing.
He was just released, but there were some conditions,
he had to give up his flesh-eating ambitions.
A few, seeking sound bites, said it was outrageous
but they fail to see it was really courageous
to demonstrate love, and to be so forgiving
by letting him live where no Board member’s living.

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Warren Bonham is a private equity investor who lives in Southlake, Texas.