.
Repaired
Debris drifts down my lacrimosa stream
shards discarded when my life exploded.
Her cheating ripped apart my every seam
left a rubble heap she soon unloaded.
Finding all my parts, your love resummed them
rebuilt a greater whole, I now can cope.
Quelling restive fears, your love benumbed them.
I set a brand-new goal; I now dare hope.
Never could I guess that you’d redeem me
regenerate my wounded dying soul.
Never thought I’d see my true love dream be
produced till you assumed the starring role.
Not dreaming now, I’m wide-awake tonight.
So, take a bow, your love has set me right.
.
.
Dean Z. Douthat is a retired engineer residing in a senior living facility in Ann Arbor, Michigan.
Nice. Heart-warming. Well-done. So glad that you have someone assuming the starting role.
Loved this lamentation with a happy ending. Very
well done, in my opinion.
Dean, I enjoyed reading your sonnet. Keep them coming!
I would like to see more of your thoughtful, wellk considered work.
Well done and moving sonnet, Enjoyed the redemptive element.
Impressive building of sonnet structure using all the tools: precise words, sound effects including masterful rhymes, well-chosen images, more than one theme supporting the main idea, and regular rhythmic lines (they carefully begin with a stress only when there is a feminine ending). Take a bow!
Which essentially renders such lines trochaic, Margaret, a very interesting ploy to maintain and sustain impeccable rhythm.
The imagery and metaphor of the first quatrain is especially impressive! The poem is very moving.
When I read the first line of quatrain 2, I thought the word ‘resummed” was a misspelling of “resumed.” It made no sense that way, but after another reading I guessed that you meant “re-summed,” which is confirmed by the rhyme with “benumbed.”
It might make sense to spell the word as “re-summed,” with a hyphen, to avoid confusing readers. No hyphen is needed in the word “benumbed,” since that is the traditional orthography.
Excellent point, Joseph, but I would also like to remind Dean that the usage of “’til” in line 12 is unnecessary and downright silly. We already have, in the English language, the word “till,” which means the same thing as “until.” I can scarcely say how many times this point has been made here on this site.
I was unaware of that usage of ’till’. Thanks for the education. I will make the change.
Thanks for the suggestion, Joseph. I’ll make that change