.
Get Along, Little DOGE-ie
Should come a day my fortunes be increased,
It’s guaranteed such bounty will be fleeced.
For government, like vacuum cleaners, sucks,
And takes one-sixth of all my hard-earned bucks.
Though spent, they say, for good things, not for ill,
I doubt that what they say is what they will.
For governments, while rarely ever chaste,
Are unapologetic making waste.
And just like Noah’s forty days of rain,
Tax dollars, in the end, go down the drain.
Or else alike some shameless burglar’s locket,
They wind up in some politician’s pocket.
.
.
Through Other’s Eyes
For you to see through other’s eyes
_Could well be hard to do.
Above all when, to your surprise,
_You see them seeing you.
When thinking of yourself, you will
_No doubt, think of your best.
Although you may not fit their bill
_Or pass the other’s test.
For just as in a mirror, you
_Observe your face reversed,
So, you, through someone else’s view,
_Might see you at your worst.
Whenever frightful truth appears,
_Try sucking on your thumb.
Or else, with fingers in your ears,
_Just close your eyes and hum.
.
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Critical Mess
A Generational a-Musing
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I don’t wanna say yes, I don’t wanna say no
I don’t wanna say stay, I don’t wanna say go
I don’t wanna stay home, I don’t wanna move away
I don’t wanna follow rules, I don’t wanna disobey
I don’t wanna suffer fools, I don’t wanna be gamed
I don’t wanna be a hero, I don’t wanna be ashamed
I don’t wanna fly the flag, I don’t wanna be taxed
I don’t wanna get sick, I don’t wanna get vaxxed.
I don’t wanna get stoned, I don’t wanna be clean
I don’t wanna be nice, I don’t wanna be mean.
I don’t wanna be poor, I don’t wanna be rich
I don’t wanna tell a lie, I don’t wanna be a snitch
I don’t wanna get married, I don’t wanna be alone
I don’t wanna pay for school, I don’t wanna pay my loan
I don’t wanna drop out, I don’t wanna drop in
I don’t wanna be her, I don’t wanna be him
I don’t wanna be you, I don’t wanna be me
I don’t wanna be tied down, I don’t wanna be free
I don’t wanna be needed, I don’t wanna be missed
I don’t wanna be stroked, I don’t wanna be dissed
I don’t wanna lift you up, I don’t wanna be put down
I don’t wanna show a smile, I don’t wanna show a frown
I don’t wanna laugh out loud, I don’t wanna hear a pun
I don’t wanna be unsafe, I don’t wanna own a gun
I don’t wanna hear it hummed, I don’t wanna hear it sung
I don’t wanna be apart, I don’t wanna be among
I don’t wanna be too short, I don’t wanna be too tall
I don’t wanna take a stand, I don’t wanna take a fall
I don’t wanna “either/or,” I don’t wanna make that call
I don’t wanna, I don’t wanna
But I wanna have it all
.
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James A. Tweedie is a retired pastor living in Long Beach, Washington. He has written and published six novels, one collection of short stories, and four collections of poetry including Sidekicks, Mostly Sonnets, and Laughing Matters, all with Dunecrest Press. His poems have been published nationally and internationally in both print and online media. He was honored with being chosen as the winner of the 2021 SCP International Poetry Competition.
The concept of “wanting to have it all” was a sideshow of the gender-feminist movement. Women felt that it was socially impossible under current conditions for them to have “all the things that men had,” because choosing to have some things made having others things not an option. Examples: being a mother, and having a career; enjoying good food, and staying attractive; raising children, and having time to yourself.
They didn’t seem to recognize that the same sundering choices also were faced by men, in ways that were specific to their gender. Nobody can “have it all.”
Choosing one thing over another is part of growing into adulthood. As you say, we can’t have it all. We can’t be married a single at the same time or have children while still trying to live as if you didn’t have them, and on and on. I’m glad you caught the point.
Mr. Tweedie, I have enjoyed all your poems. But you’re on DOGE I don’t understand. True, government sucks up a huge amount of money, and wastes or misspends a good portion of it; why make this fact the centerpiece of a poem decrying DOGE? The whole point of DOGE I to 1. Stop the case, 2 Stopp the misspelling-? ie, to stop sucking so many of your bucks? Am I missing something?
Re Edward’s comment below:
The only appearance of the word DOGE is in the poem’s title where it is used as a pun, referencing the old cowboy phrase, “Get along little doggie.” (A doggie being an orphaned calf). The intent of the pun is to encourage DOGE to “get along” (ie. to “keep moving forward”) with what they are doing to expose and reduce the fraud, corruption, abuse and waste of tax dollars in our Federal government. Aside from the pun, I don’t think I misspelled anything? I hope this answers your question. Thanks for taking the time to comment.
The first poem is a trenchant take on what happens to our tax dollars that allow politicians to line their own pockets. So sad, but so true. “Through Other’s Eyes” has some well-chosen lines and abjures us that the way we see ourselves is not the way others see us. This is a great reminder of that. What an amazing list of “wannas and don’t wannas” in the third poem.
Roy,
I’m glad you like “Through Other’s Eyes.” Of the three, that is my favorite.
“Get Along..” rings so true. Great stuff, James.
Roy,
I’m glad you like “Through Other’s Eyes.” Of the three, that is my favorite.
Cheryl,
Sadly, it rings true for me, too.
Somehow my comment for Roy slipped into the wrong place…oopsy,
I just love the little DOGE-ie. Such a nice balance between some humor and beauty!
Jenna,
Glad you caught the humor and doubly so if you found any beauty in it!
I especially liked ‘Through Others Eyes’, especially in this era when everyone seems to know best. You’ve distilled the phenomena down to what it is.
For some reason, with Critical Mess, I envisioned those horrendous who have tantrums in the supermarket and lie on the ground writing and screaming till they get what they want. Alas, I have that to look forward to this summer in Albion.
Thanks for the reads.
Thanks, Paul. Is the screaming mess awaiting you in Albion and new arrival? If so, a hearty congratulations to you. If it is something other than that, then just keep in mind the lyric of this old Ella Fitzgerald ditty:
Such a great success?
What made Wellington
Do what he did at Waterloo?
What makes every Englishman
A fighter through and through?
It isn’t roast beef, or ale, or home, or mother
It’s just a little thing they sing to one another
Stiff upper lip, stout fella
Carry on, old fluff
Chin up, keep muddling through
Stiff upper lip, stout fella
When the going’s rough
Pip pip to old man trouble
And a toodly-oo too
Carry on through thick and thin
If you feel you’re in the right
Does the fighting spirit win?
Quite, quite, quite, quite, quite
Stiff upper lip, stout fella
When you’re in the stew
Sober or blotto, this is your motto
Keep muddling through . . .
“Through Other’s Eyes” is my favourite, although all three are so good to read and digest. It’s nice to know that you guys over there are also being fleeced by big government. (Love the Ella Fitzgerald lyrics by the way) Toodle Pip from over here.’
Toodle pip and g’die t’ yer too, guv’nor!
Here’s a DOGE anecdote I thought you might like, James. It comes from an opponent who was complaining of the many wonderfully funded projects DOGE has stopped. He claimed someone had actually gone to the DOGE office to protest, and found it poorly furnished and occupied by no one. I can only think that if DOGE massively pares down the federal budget without the heavy expenses of keeping a swamp storefront open, all the more does the little DOGE-ie deserve your encouragement.
Margaret,
That’s a good story, but I hope there are as many DOGE-ites working to salvage the good bits as there are throwing out or exposing the bad. A woman we know who lives on a relatively small fixed income was receiving a necessary and effective cutting-edge medication for free as part of a grant-funded research project. DOGE rescinded the grant, the program closed (or went into remission/hibernation) and she now is paying more than $1,000/month out of pocket for the same med. Also, a local very large and very successful Job Corps program with many employees and student/trainees was cut along with the entire national program (some of which were deemed inefficient). This has had a significant negative social and economic impact on the broad but small semi-rural community it serves. Although a court has put a stay on the closures, most of the students and staff have read the writing on the wall and either quit or dropped out. DOGE claims to have a team of people handling public complaints and reviewing decisions to correct and reconsider such misdirected heavy-handedness but if there is no one in the office then I’m concerned about the many babies that are being thrown out with the bureaucratic bathwater. Many MAGA voters previously served by these now-cancelled programs support the intent of what DOGE is doing but are now tempted to join local No King protests in rural, politically red areas because they have no other way to vent their personal frustration. Both my wife and I—polar opposites, politically—are, each in our own way, seeing the downside of DOGE on our community.
It will take a bulldoger to get rid of all the Government waste, and it can’t happen soon enough.
Social phenomenology is a bitch!
The sole virtue of the narrator in the third poem is that he doesn’t use the word “can’t.”
Well put, as usual. Thanks, C.B.