.
Keep Calm and Carry On!
“UK heatwave: Temperatures to rise to 41C amid extreme
heat warning” —BBC News
“The first Red Extreme heat warning issued”
—British Met Office
The BBC is roaring like the sun
With news of scorching days of blazing heat.
All burning thoughts of giddy, gleeful fun
Are dreams that high minds shouldn’t deign to greet—
The Kingdom’s set to wither and ignite.
It’s prey to Gaia’s torrid, tropic bite.
This foolish, fevered theatre of dread,
This woeful show of tragic consequence,
This scripted piffle aimed to stress the head
Of those not blessed with elements of sense,
Will guarantee all revelry and sizzle
Will ebb and flag and droop and sag and shrivel.
I speak as a survivor of rare boils
On British soil in days when heads stayed cool—
A splash of solar sass would never spoil
Our joy with silly, sunless safety rules.
This spell of sweatiness, this hellish bummer
Should be embraced. It’s known elsewhere as Summer.
.
.
Susan Jarvis Bryant has poetry published on Lighten Up Online, Snakeskin, Light, Sparks of Calliope, and Expansive Poetry Online. She also has poetry published in TRINACRIA, Beth Houston’s Extreme Formal Poems anthology, and in Openings (anthologies of poems by Open University Poets in the UK). Susan is the winner of the 2020 International SCP Poetry Competition, and has been nominated for the 2022 Pushcart Prize.








The environmentalist freaks will be screaming about “Global Warming,” no doubt.
It’s all part of the Greta Thunberg kabuki-theater of mindless hysteria.
Joe, you are so right. I am expecting a clueless Thunbergian troll to rear up on this page and start bleating on about the dangers of a sweaty Summer in the U.K. before the day is out.
Just as the rain seemed to go on forever, so will the heat.
I’m an Anglophile myself, but get used to it, Brits, weather is weather… always has been, always will be.
Wise words, Sally. The Brits have survived far worse and all these nannies telling them how to brave the soaring temps are an insult to everyone’s intelligence… well, nearly everyone’s.
Thanks, Susan. Even the silly interludes in our “fevered theatre of dread” deserve a poetic clamor of cold water. And doesn’t every Briton have an umbrella that could double as a parasol on a recreational outdoor stroll? Won’t the petrol price crisis be even worse if people huddle inside around air-conditioners and electric fans? Then come warnings not to consume power because of likely brownouts and electric-grid failure. Always a new disaster–just cope by using your own cool judgment and giving the safety rulers some solar sass!
I agree wholeheartedly, Margaret! Solar sass is what’s needed… that and a gin and tonic and a good poetry book under the shade of an oak. Chin-chin! Bottoms and umbrellas up! 🙂
a very rare interlude of sub tropical heat. Apparently the conditions are just right for it to seep up from Africa for a few days. The BBC who are leading propagandists for the warmist cause have been hysterical about it –lurid dark red graphics and warnings of doom. And shrieking that the Met Office have declared it the first RED ALERT (extreme heat emergency) Evvahh– This designation was only introduced last year so its not surprising that it has been announced for the first time. I think its great– we usually have to fly to Spain to get heat like this– and while there, people don’t seem to die in their thousands of it. People will be off to the seaside in droves but unfortunately the North Sea will still be near its summer max here– 15C or bloody cold—it will still be — to quote Joyce’s immortal words– the scrotum tightening sea.
What a wonderful comment from a Brit who knows how to survive in style without advice from the “experts”… you have put this whole idiotic charade into perspective and for that I thank you, Dave! I hope you’re in your garden raising a toast to this non-BBQ Summer… a rarity in the UK. I hear the heatwave is only here for a couple of days… blink and you’ll miss it!
First, the poem is amazing and spot on. I know you remember the heat wave in ‘76 that lasted two and a half months… water rationing… stand pipes in the street for water… “Save water, bath with a friend”… classes held outside under a shade tree… now we have an emergency for two days that the high temperature MIGHT hit a record…. then back to typical miserable weather… really, BBC, can’t you find something a little scarier?
Don’t forget the heatwaves in 1911 and 1936 in England… this is so ridiculous… somehow, in Texas we’ve managed to thrive in much hotter conditions, however, we’ve only barely hit 100F this summer… so much for climate catastrophes…
This article and the comment section give a bit of perspective, like Dave Etchell has above:
https://wattsupwiththat.com/2022/07/16/think-its-not-now-how-britain-roasted-in-ten-week-heatwave-during-summer-of-76/
Mike, you don’t realize what a godsend this heat wave has been to the BBC. As I departed the UK a month ago, the great alarm was that persons still wearing masks would be ridiculed and discriminated against. All of a sudden, TV street scenes began to show masked individuals, when the day before there were none. My personal estimate of the chance of seeing a mask-wearer in London was about one in 10,000 persons. I can just see BBC camera crews offering masks and bank notes to passersby, in order to find and film masked persons in need of protection from popular rancor.
Margaret, unfortunately Monday has turned out to be a huge disappointment to the ghouls at the BBC. Temperatures peaked this afternoon at 37°C at Bedford (north of London) at 4pm, needed to reach 37.8 to break the local record. I’m sure the BBC has their collective fingers crossed for a catastrophe tomorrow… the rest of the week will be much cooler.
Mike, I survived the long hot Summer of ’76. I was a school kid then and I’m certain that summer put me in good stead for the breathtaking heat and humidity of the coastal plains of Texas. For that, I am grateful. And to think, as a child, you survived temperatures well over 100f without air-con! We’re lucky to be alive!
I checked and 32 degrees C = 90 (actually 89.6) degrees F. We have been above that by 10 to 15 degrees in Texas, since May. I found the discussions as fascinating as the poem which was so well crafted by one who has dealt with both “summers.” Maybe the Brits should advertise as the new Canary Islands.
Roy, I’m thrilled someone has seen the bright side of the U.K. heat… tourism would definitely go up if the heat lasted longer than the predicted five minutes and it was a hot as they claimed! Thank you for your sanity and appreciation of my poetry.
Roy, BBC Weather is forecasting a high of 40°C (104°F) Monday in London, (I have a screen cap of the forecast page updated at 7:02 AM London Time) but will it happen? We’ll see…
The highest temperature ever measured in Texas was 120°F (48.9°C), recorded on August 12, 1936 in Seymour, during the 1936 North American Heatwave, and again on June 28, 1994 in Monahans. Of course, this year it is much cooler at around a hundred… 🙂
My favourite line – ‘those not blessed with elements of sense’ – seems to cut both ways.
Air conditioning in the UK is a rarity and of course humidity (‘mugginess’) is likely not a factor in places like inland Texas. But then let’s not let facts like that get in the way of bashing a news organisation.
Meanwhile, in Spain, heat stress has put paid to hundreds, mostly the elderly.
Cuts both ways, Paul… You are saying that Susan is not blessed with sense. In saying that you are also saying that every other commenter above is not blessed with sense. I think we deserve an apology.
No, you don’t. I’m entitled to a different opinion without being told I lack sense.
Paul, if you’re entitled to a different opinion without being told you lack sense, than so is Susan. If she isn’t, then neither are you. Either way, your statement refutes itself.
Today’s forecast high in Surrey, UK… 95°F
Today’s forecast high in Abu Dhabi… 105°F… Oh the humanity!
Mortality from low temperature days in Spain is equal to mortality from high temperature days in Spain. Worldwide cold temperatures kill many more people than high temperatures. England has many more low temperature deaths than high, and the cost of electricity is increasing the mortality on cold days.
Here most people move from an air-conditioned house to an air-conditioned car, to an air-conditioned office.
There’s also a mid-day break for those working outdoors for three hours during the heat of the day. And when working outside we’re provided with shade and water.
We’re prepared for heat and humidity. Surrey ain’t.
You can add this to your research, if you like.
It’s a miracle anyone survived the heat before air conditioning…
Speaking of mugginess… after lunch in London the humidity will be less than 20%.
BBC Complains England’s Women’s Football Team is “Too White”
BBC Lost 270,000 Licence Fee Payers Last Year
BBC Scrubs “Ali” From Munich Killer’s Name on TV
BBC Altered Alleged Rape Victim’s Quote to Not ‘Misgender’ Attacker
Woke BBC Faces Backlash for ‘Pregnant People’ Abortion Coverage
BBC Journalist Mistakes Walmart BB Gun for ‘a Rifle and Ammunition‘
I see what you mean Paul, BBC demonstrates the acme of journalism and common sense… you are right to take up for them. In fact, I should probably apologize to you!
NAHHHH… just kidding…
I thought you were making these up to make fun of the BBC, until I searched the headlines and found out that you weren’t!
I can’t tell the real thing from the satires anymore.
Joshua, the Beeb has been beyond parody for years and years…
It’s 12:25 PM in London Monday, July 18, 2022
the temperature is 33°C (91.4°F)
Will London hit 41°C today?
Headline from Saturday, July 16, 2022
London Set to be Hotter than Dubai on Monday as 41C Predicted in West of Capital https://www.msn.com/en-gb/news/uknews/london-set-to-be-hotter-than-dubai-on-monday-as-41c-predicted-in-west-of-capital/ar-AAZCgJm
The BBC predicted 41°C as today’s high temp.
They changed that prediction to 40°C at 7:02 this morning.
I have the screen cap.
BBC 11:04 am update changed the 40°C prediction to 38°C…
BBC 12:05 pm update changed the 38°C prediction to 39°C…
BBC 1:01 pm update changed the 39°C prediction to 38°C…
BBC 1:59 pm update still predicting 38°C…
BBC 2:01 pm update still predicting 38°C…
BBC 2:58 pm update still predicting 38°C…
BBC 4:00 pm update changed the 38°C prediction to 37°C…
As of now the BBC has lowered the predicted high for today from 41°C (105.8°F) to 37°C (98.6°F)
so the BBC has missed todays high by 7.2°F or 4°C …
We are witnessing true BBC climate science in action.
These are the same guys that are saying they can predict temps for the next hundred years… it is to laugh…
Not looking good for the weather wranglers…
As all the changes are happening at the BBC, my cheap, little Dark Sky Weather App has been maintaining a high forecast of 36°C (98.6°F) hmmm not a record high… who will be closer, BBC or Dark Sky?
Dark Sky Beats BBC !!!
Mike, those examples are solid proof that the BBC is not a news agency but a propaganda outlet for left-liberal pieties. They are as agenda-driven as Dr. Goebbels in the Third Reich.
Here’s a poem about the BBC written by Candace Ruggieri, and published in a past issue of TRINACRIA:
The BBC
I loathe the goddamned British news,
And when it’s on, I always choose
To shut my ears to what it spews.
I’d rather have a cup of tea
Than listen to the BBC.
You’d have to be both deaf and dumb
Not to recognize it, chum–
No Tory gets fair treatment from
The Labour-loving clerisy
Who man the mikes at BBC.
They give the news a leftist spin
As blatant as a shot of gin
While mugging with a sheepish grin–
Plain facts you’ll neither hear nor see
When tuned in to the BBC.
They don’t like logic or debate,
Which they term “Giving voice to hate”–
They’d rather whine and smugly prate.
Clear thought’s a liability
When working for the BBC.
Now lying’s common, I’ll agree,
And folks can lie as readily
At CNN and NBC,
But neither one lies steadily
Like liars at the BBC.
–from TRINACRIA, Issue No. 16 (Fall 2016). p. 76.
But Joe, that poem appears to be “bashing a news organization”
None so blind, etc.
Tag team time, folks!
Well, Paul, it’s easier to say that than to deal with the facts and links that Mike Bryant has brought up about BBC bias, isn’t it?
You can’t seriously think that the BBC is now anything more than a megaphone for left-Labourite wokesters and cocktail-party Marxists.
Joe, Paul just can’t take the heat…
None so blind as obsessive cherry-pickers.
Paul, if all the facts and figures cited by Mike Bryant are just “cherry picking,” then the BBC sure seems to be one helluva big cherry tree.
Is it so hard for you to admit that your precious BBC has a marked left-liberal political agenda, and pushes it insistently?
Thank you for this spot-on, highly amusing poem on the duplicitous BBC. Candace Ruggieri is blessed with talent and sense – a definite asset in these days of insidious idiocy.
More perspective for anyone interested in historic truth:
https://realclimatescience.com/2022/07/100-degrees-in-london/
Susan/Mike, we are sitting at 34 Celsius today in middle England where our news reporters are frantically searching in vain for a buckled-rail disaster as we are urged to smother any passing pensioner in wet towels before we slide into Armageddon. You have summed up all the climate scares with your wonderful poem. By the way, our energy provider tells us that you Americans use more electricity on air-con than Africa uses on everything.
Hey, Jeff, I’m praying the wind turbines/mills spin up enough energy in Old Blighty this winter to keep you and yours warm and toasty… now… who will pay the electric bills? Maybe we can borrow more money from China.
Jeff, your comment has left me sniggering – thank you. During this sinister age of the scaremonger, a good laugh is a must – I thought I’d try to raise a smile my poem. Sadly, some are unable to appreciate my efforts and continue to moon in the gloom. One can but try! I hope you are coping and taking those necessary precautions to keep calm and carry on. I know it can get tough. Mike and I have been without air con on many an occasion here in Texas… a week once, after Hurricane Harvey hit, and it was August! The mosquitoes were the size of hummingbirds and we were dripping with sweat and ripe for bites… but, we kept calm, carried on, and lived to tell the tale even though Mike is a pensioner.
Susan/Mike, I well recall the long, hot summer of 1976 when our minister of sport, Denis Howell was appointed to be minister of drought. Before the ink was dry on his contract, the heavens opened and under the deluge, poor Denis became minister of floods. Balance will be restored later this week as we all resume our grumbling about grey skies, the cost of fuel and the Conservative party tearing itself apart.
A very amusing poem, Susan. It’s hard for me to get bent out of shape at 39 C (89.6 F) when I come from Los Angeles and it was frequently that hot in May and November, let alone the dog days of summer. Even as we speak, Santa Fe and Albuquerque are in the mid 90s. Yawn. However, when Portland OR hit a hellish and humidly whopping 116 F two years ago that was noteworthy. Of course, I attributed that to karma.
I can imagine a sequel to your poem in which the River Thames sizzles and Big Ben melts like a candle, its clockface distorting into the Dali painting “Persistence of Memory” as the ravens at the Tower finally hightail it to Iceland.
Thank you for putting things into perspective, Brian, and I just love your idea for a sequel – magnificent!! Weather is a strange animal. It always has been and always will be – regardless of what mankind does to stop it. I remember snow in June in England. I also remember a childhood of bitter winters with no central heating… I could see my breath hang in the air like a cloud when I got out of bed. I also remember wearing a hat, gloves, and two pairs of socks to bed to stave off the chill… that coupled with searing Indian summers in September, and the Great Storm of ’87, makes for some amazing conservations. That’s why Brits always talk about the weather… it’s so darn interesting.
Real fun, Susan! You know the quote from C. S. Lewis in one of his letters to children, I think . . . the one about summer coming to England once every seven years?
Gail, what a great comment… I had never heard that quote from C.S. Lewis. He’s got it just about right, which is why the hysteria is mounting… the media must cash in on the rarity to promote the Green New Deal. Thank you very much!
https://www.newcivilengineer.com/latest/arcadis-wraps-hammersmith-bridge-in-foil-to-withstand-extreme-heat-18-07-2022/
Thank goodness someone is getting government contracts from this climate catastrophe!
Today, Monday was a big fail for the BBC and the climate experts. Now they are saying the high tomorrow in London will be 38°C. I wonder if they will miss that one too… stay tuned for updates tomorrow.
At least they did manage to frighten at least one person.
Paul, you said, “Meanwhile, in Spain, heat stress has put paid to hundreds, mostly the elderly.”
You might want to consider this. Cold weather kills people.
This is very well documented. Heat kills, but then after the heat waves the death rate drops below the accepted average for a few weeks.
Reason? Extreme heat harms the frail.
This is not true of extreme cold. Death rate rises… then returns to normal.
Cold causes excess deaths. Heat deaths average out.
Susan – another fine and timely poem. Thanks.
Thank you very much, Russel – much appreciated!
Susan,
Well said!
“This spell of sweatiness, this hellish bummer
Should be embraced. It’s known elsewhere as Summer.”
Going to be a balmy 39C today, here in the Denver area. My kids are embracing it with iced tea, sunblock, (and a little fun in the sprinkler — ssshhhh).
Thank you very much for your appreciative comment, Anna. I also love the way your kids are embracing the heat – I’m going to adapt for adults… sunblock, a sombrero, a margarita, a siesta… Zzzzzz
No war today, no social strife,
what will we scare them with tonight?
Well, if we haven’t stories better,
than we’ll sensationalize the weather.
You are spot on with this smile of a knowing poem, Michael. Bravo!
Wonderful poem Susan. The weather is the weather, and it tends to change now and again!!
Norma, you are a woman after my own heart… I love your down to earth comment in a world that’s away with the fairies and I thank you for your sanity and integrity.
I’ve just re-read my comment and can see I’ve flouted every rule in the political correctness manual… I shouldn’t have made those remarks. I’m not a biologist, a psychologist, or a fairyologist and I don’t give a pigeon’s coo! Norma, you bring out the naughty in me! 🙂
Common-sense is what you have Susan, which seems to be a deficiency, greatly in need of revival.
Susan, another great one, as usual! Love the punch line.
Josh, thank you very much… I believe punchlines like this bring a bit of cool perspective to a world of constant fearmongering.
Above quote from:
https://thehornnews.com/uk-endures-first-ever-extreme-heat-warning-with-99-degree-temp/
I WILL be very surprised to see 43°C ANYWHERE in England tomorrow.
Are we scared yet?
Despite the above quote, the BBC is forecasting a high temperature of 38°C at 3:00 pm in London tomorrow, Tuesday, July 19.
I’ll be watching tomorrow.
Extreme cold is far more deadly than extreme heat. In fact, studies by the US National Weather Service, Britain’s The Lancet medical journal, the Centers for Disease Control, The American Council on Science and Health, among others, claim that extreme cold is responsible worldwide for twenty times as many deaths as extreme heat. Furthermore, extended periods of below normal temperatures, as experienced during the Little Ice Age (c.1300-1850), was the cause of economic and cultural stagnation as well as frequent famines due to reduced growing seasons. Naturally the climate activists carefully avoid referring to such facts. – Edward Katz