‘Snowshoeing on a Winter Morning’: A Poem by Paul Buchheit

This is a beautiful sonnet, with diction and imagery perfectly fitted for a winter scene. All of it is neatly connected with the description of the woman who accompanies the speaker, and the adroit use of color (silver, white, pinkish blush, blue, pearly) seems to illuminate not just the landscape, but the woman herself. The octet is so intense that I’m glad the writer left a line space between it and the poem’s closure, where the volta carries the reader into a description of movement, and a focus on the woman’s beauty.

I love the verb “shoes” — a perfect choice for the start of line 9. But all of the diction in this poem is as cool and fresh as the winter scene itself (“puffery of white,” “stony icescapes,” “cotton boughs,” “wafts and withers”).

I have one question. The final couplet pairs “eyes” and “reprise” as a rhyme. I take the correct pronunciation of “reprise” to be reh-PREEZE. Now I am perfectly aware that poets have the license to use sight rhymes or near rhymes, rather than the usual phonic ones, and perhaps there are some places where “reprise” is pronounced reh-PRIZE. But the point I’m making is this — sight rhymes or near rhymes may occasionally be acceptable, but NOT in the final lines of a poem, especially in one like this where everything else runs as smoothly as a Swiss watch. The end of a poem is where the metrical and rhyming contract with the reader must be maintained without violation.

I recall the opinion of the late poet Henry George Fischer, a very careful craftsman with language. He said “Using a sight rhyme at the closure of a poem is the literary equivalent of coitus interruptus — it’s deeply disappointing to everybody.”

Beautiful love sonnet that inspires and uplifts the heart.

Paul, “Snowshoeing” sparkles splendidly, with all the beauties Joseph Salemi has analyzed. Unlike Joe, though, I failed to notice the rhyme discrepancy at the end. Agreed that the current authoritatively correct pronunciation is as in French, but I use the spoken word frequently, almost always referring to music, as I believe you intend here. It’s a magnificently meaningful ending. I and nearly all of my American interlocutors say re-PRIZE, while in British university circles I am more likely to hear re-PREEZE, or even RE-preeze. They know their French–whereas my musician friends of many nations in California are more attuned to English words like “disguise.” If we went way back to its French origins, we’d have to say “GHEEZE” but nobody does anymore. Probably, the spoken sound of “reprise” will naturally tend toward perfect rhyme with “eyes” and “disguise.”

Joe is right about a perfect rhyme sound at the end of the poem, but despite the authorities we are already in the situation where “reprise” in global English has two possible pronunciations–and the “incorrect” one is understood and usually accepted without complaint. Thus SOME readers are sure to find your rhyme imperfect! Maybe you could revise and perfect the rhyme, but then would the meaning suit as well?

In addition to the scenic magic of this sonnet, what intensifies it is the concluding couplet’s subtle demonstration of the lady’s unshaken confidence in her skill. I enjoyed this very much, Paul. Thanks for sharing.