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Bloat
A warrior is battling the bloat
Of bulging skivers bleeding strivers dry—
The gloating glut of grubbers kept afloat
By worn out workers as these shirkers shy
Away from promises that snared their vote.
A warrior is battling the bloat.
A conqueror is scything surplus fat.
The plumpest cats with whiskers dripping cream
Are tossed from where their derrieres have sat
Wide and idle in the stark extreme.
A twitch afflicts each portly bureaucrat.
A conqueror is scything surplus fat.
There’s something blithe and lithesome in the air.
There’s something lean and dreamy on the breeze.
A heap of hope is burying despair
Beneath a clump of budding money trees.
The flabby rats are fleeing to their lair.
There’s something blithe and lithesome in the air.
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skiver: someone who shirks their duty
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Fired!
Snide connivers hissing spite
Glide through corridors of might.
What snail brain and earthworm eye
Let these snotty snakes sneak by?
Swamp residers dark as night,
Sniffing out sweet sheep to smite,
Spark the orange tyger’s ire…
He has scaly curs to fire.
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Susan Jarvis Bryant is a poet originally from the U.K., now living on the Gulf Coast of Texas.
You beat me to it, young lady, and I can thoroughly sense the giddy delight you enjoyed when you finished polishing these 2 little gems. U 2 know, without surprise, that Connie and I both share your political perspectives, and are always delighted and impressed with your unequaled enthusiasm for expressing them in your nearly unique SJB-blue-ribbon style. A very stimulating way to start our day – we thank you for the pair of agitating overdoses! 🙂
Thank you very much, Mark. Let’s hope the funds are cut from the branches the fat-cats lounge on. I worry this strategy will impact the poorest who work the hardest. But it is a step in the right direction… Government this large and greedy cannot be sustained.
These are two gems skewering bloated government hacks and skivers. At last they have encountered someone with a conscience and the DOGE actions that seek to eliminate positions of perceived power and bureaucratic inefficiency with paltry and undeserving results. I have long held this view of what our government had become–a wastrel and a weasel.
Thank you so much, Roy. It’s about time the government-stoked wars stopped making fat cats money at the expense of millions of lives. It’s time for peace… and that means an end to the chaos stirred up by overpaid rogue factions of our government – chaos that makes the rich richer and kills the poor.
You know I just love your poetry. Though you don’t just come out and say it, NGO’s are responsible for much of the bloat. You and I have spoken over the years about the fairly recent explosion of these “extra-government” organizations. We’ve known that they really serve one purpose, namely enriching the connected. It has nothing to do with democracy… it is kleptocracy, plain and simple.
Anyone that is screaming about looking into the books is a thief.
Here is a very interesting peek behind the curtains… we now have the receipts:
https://worldnews.whatfinger.com/2025/02/28/eye-opening-information-regarding-the-pritzker-familys-ngos-how-is-he-allowed-to-be-a-governor/
And this is the tiniest part of the iceberg of corruption.
The state of Illinois is so massively corrupt, and has been that way for so many decades, that payoffs, graft, rigged elections, and outright thievery are now hallowed traditions there. The Pritzker family is simply part of those traditions, just as Al Capone and Bugs Moran were.
Thank you, Mike and Joe, for keeping us informed – for seeking the truth the MSM tramples on.
Your turning “Bloat” into “blithe” is a delightfully seasonal spring song, Susan. The huge quantities of frivolous fat being found do actually bring hope for a slimmer, trimmer government. And President Trump’s strongest supporters will roar happily at your describing the “orange tyger” as a fire-breathing dragon.
I have high hopes my seasonal song will bring a dumpy dose of relief for all affected by obese government greed. Thank you, Margaret.
“Bloat: is another cornucopia of alliteration! I can’t say “gloating glut of grubbers” aloud without tripping over my tongue. What a twister! Interesting rhyme scheme and I like how the first and last lines repeat. The recurring “s” sound in each line of “Fired” reinforces the imagery of hissing snakes.
I simply can’t help myself, Cheryl… and those hiSSing sssnakes begged for a splash of sibilance. Thank you for trying to read the challenging Bloat aloud – a new drinking game, perhaps?
How can liberals dare to look?
They duck Susan’s right jab* and get her left hook.
*rarely
Both of these are masterful. It’s impossible to read these and not see vivid images of the rot and corruption that has been allowed to fester for too long.
Warren, I thoroughly appreciate you comment – thank you. As a poet who deals in satire, you know how tough it is to get it right when it comes to getting a poetic point across. I’m thrilled I succeeded.
Both poems are marvelous commentary on DOGE and the draining of the political swamp that has been strangling our government and society for years! In “Bloat” there are many evocative images including those hilarious plump cats and flabby rats. But you contrast the imagery of bloat and rather gross self-indulgence with imagery that extends into the heroic. You transform what is basically an audit process into an epic adventure engaged in by an unnamed hero who is a “conqueror” and a “warrior.” Instead of the monotony of ledgers and debits and credits we are treated to someone akin to Hercules or Achilles engaged in battle. This poem is a Musk-read.
Though it’s a much shorter poem, I actually favor “Fired!” Starting with the meaning-loaded title, you offer an incantation which would make the Weird Sisters proud. You are clearly aiming for a Shakespearian tone (“tyger” though Blakeian serves well-enough to suggest olde Times along with your macabre potion imagery) and your tone of menace and witchcraft works well to cast out these snaky demons who inhabit and exploit the swamp. It’s short but it’s extremely evocative and really rather perfect. I’m reminded of a John Dryden coinage — I believe it was Absalom and Achitophel — where he describes “statecraft” — a portmanteau word which links politics with witchcraft. There’s real insight to that coinage which also appears in your superlative, sardonic gem.
Brian, what a perspicacious, encouraging, and appreciative comment. As I said to Warren in my words above, it’s tough to get a grave point across creatively, which is why I am so utterly grateful for your fine eye.
I like to use vivid imagery, allusion, and musicality – I’m over the moon you always manage to spot this. I’m also grateful for your interesting and educational pointers – this time to Dryden’s “Absalom and Achitophel” – what a powerful and beguiling piece. I happen to believe the machinations of a greedy, overblown government is full of smoke, mirrors, and high-and-mighty hexes (stirred up in a cauldron of brown-nose toadies) to dupe the people into submission.
Brian – you have made my Monday morning. Thank you very much indeed!