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Home Poetry

‘An Awkward Endorsement’: A Poem by Susan Jarvis Bryant

September 8, 2024
in Poetry, Satire
A A
32
poems 'An Awkward Endorsement': A Poem by Susan Jarvis Bryant

.

An Awkward Endorsement

on Putin’s recent endorsement of Kamala Harris for president

There’s no disputing, Putin’s put the boot in.
In rooting for Ms. Harris, he has sent
The press into a tizzy. Now they’re shootin’
For reasons to declare Vlad’s backing bent.
How dare this cunning, Trump-adoring chump
Sink the spin that makes the suckered jump.

Russia! Russia! Russia! Russia! Russia!
Blighted nights for four long orange years.
Russia! Russia! Russia! Russia! Russia!
The hoax that stoked the scam collusion fears
Festers at the feet of those who poke
The bear. They’re now the butt of Russia’s joke.

.

.

Susan Jarvis Bryant is a poet originally from the U.K., now living on the Gulf Coast of Texas.

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Comments 32

  1. Wayne says:
    2 years ago

    lovely

    Reply
    • Susan Jarvis Bryant says:
      2 years ago

      Thank you, Wayne!

      Reply
  2. Margaret Coats says:
    2 years ago

    Exactly, Susan. Bad guys can make good jokes, and it’s hard to imagine how the clever Russian could bear to miss this opportunity.

    Reply
    • Susan Jarvis Bryant says:
      2 years ago

      Margaret, I agree wholeheartedly.

      Reply
  3. Yael says:
    2 years ago

    Too funny! I wonder if the Russians are trying to one-up the Babylon Bee? The whole poem is a riot, but I think the opening line is my favorite. It’s hard to beat “There’s no disputing, Putin’s put the boot in” as an intro.

    Reply
    • Susan Jarvis Bryant says:
      2 years ago

      Yael, thank you! You make such a great point. I am hard pressed to tell the difference between the truth and the spoof… in fact the truth is more outrageous. What on earth has this world come to?! My muse is never still.

      Reply
  4. Cynthia Erlandson says:
    2 years ago

    Hilarious, Susan! “Four long orange years” — what a hoot, and a great phrase that gets inside the heads of those with Trump Derangement Syndrome. Once again, you’ve gotten the scoop; I’ve learned a bit of news through your poem, since I hadn’t heard this story yet — (Unless Yael is onto something and this is another great Babylon Bee-type of story) so, thank you! I’ll keep my ears open for the story tomorrow.

    Reply
    • Yael says:
      2 years ago

      It’s becoming increasingly difficult to distinguish fake satire news from the other fake news and I’m simply at a loss here:
      https://babylonbee.com/news/maybe-we-went-wrong-somewhere-thinks-party-whose-candidate-just-got-endorsed-by-dick-cheney-and-vladimir-putin

      Reply
      • Susan Jarvis Bryant says:
        2 years ago

        Yael, thank you for this! You are so right!!

        Reply
    • Susan Jarvis Bryant says:
      2 years ago

      Cynthia, thank you for this. I can’t help laughing. The word “orange” is a definite trigger for those with TDS, and there are many out there. I think it’s about time that old cliche, “like a red rag to a bull” was changed to, “like an orange rind to the cuckoo mind”.

      Reply
  5. Mark Stellinga says:
    2 years ago

    Great zinger, Susan – as Putin’s political endorsement is certainly not a coveted one amongst us ‘rigthies’, in my opinion, Donny-John-the-elder picks up a few million more votes in this scenario. Bless his heart —

    Reply
    • Susan Jarvis Bryant says:
      2 years ago

      Mark, thank you very much. I love the word “zinger” – I might steal it for my next poem.

      Reply
      • Mark Stellinga says:
        2 years ago

        Help yourself, my dear, I prob’ly stole it myself! 🙂 ‘Zing” away…

        Reply
  6. Roy Eugene Peterson says:
    2 years ago

    Beware a bear bearing gifts.

    Reply
    • Susan Jarvis Bryant says:
      2 years ago

      … especially when he’s smirking. Thank you, Roy.

      Reply
  7. Brian A. Yapko says:
    2 years ago

    A sly poem, Susan, which nails it. I was about to link the identical Babylon Bee article about the Democrat candidate somehow attracting the endorsements of the most heinous people on the planet — but Yael beat me to it! It amazes me how much people fear strength and competence because he doesn’t make them feel good. Would that be part of the decision-making if we were looking for a surgeon to save a life, or an airline pilot? Or would you just want the damned best person for the job? I’ll take the offensive George Patton over the woke (so-called) Rachel Levine any day of the week.

    I love the not one but two lines that repeat “Russia, Russia, Russia, Russia, Russia.” Only the most secure of poets would dream of getting away with that. You are secure, Susan, and you do pull it off. And it works. As I’ve said before, one of my favorite lines in all of Shakespeare is from King Lear: “Howl, howl, howl, howl, howl.”

    Reply
    • Susan Jarvis Bryant says:
      2 years ago

      Brian, I’m with you all the way on the Patton over Levine front and I’m positively thrilled you liked my Russia-ad-infinitum. I wanted to capture the hysteria of Russiagate – oh how the MSM howled on and on and on with the propaganda to the point I thought the Russians were responsible for the death of my dishwasher! I love Shakespeare’s “men of stones” line… sometimes a bit of repetition works wonders… lest we forget. Thank you very much indeed!

      Reply
  8. Lannie David Brockstein says:
    2 years ago

    Susan, here in chilly Canada, the subject matter of your heated “An Awkward Endorsement” poem is insightful of the mainstream media’s cognitive dissonance that is symptomatic of its intellectual dishonesty. It is also reminiscent of the evil Muslim supremacist Hamas terrorist organization, when it thanked the blackface-Trudeau government this past December for being the Left supremacist enabler of Muslim supremacism that it is.

    ~~~~~
    Toronto Sun (December 20th, 2023) – “‘EMBARRASSING:’ Hamas thanks Liberal gov’t for ceasefire support”: https://torontosun.com/news/world/embarrassing-hamas-thanks-liberal-govt-for-ceasefire-support
    ~~~~~

    Regarding Poutine the pig, it is easy-cheesy for us to predict that glutton wants to keep riding the O’Brandon gravy train, because he is greedy to annex northern Canada and its arctic shipping lanes, as he has already gorged on parts of Georgia, as well as Crimea and other parts of Ukraine.

    From Lannie.

    Reply
    • Susan Jarvis Bryant says:
      2 years ago

      Lannie, I believe the people are being pushed and pulled in every direction as far as the “news” is concerned… by design, of course. The more confused the masses are, the easier they are to control. It just struck me as amusing that the side who accused Trump of collusion with Russia has now received a pat on the back by the villain they condemned for four longwinded years… like I said above, I’m certain it’s all designed to gaslight those who follow the MSM’s take on this wicked world.

      Reply
  9. Paul A. Freeman says:
    2 years ago

    An amazing first line, indeed, and an interesting take on Putin’s endorsement.

    However: ‘Alas, it’s a con, Putin’s having us on’.

    For your interest, RT (Russia TV), which I believe is censored in the US and is the mouthpiece of Putin and the Russian government, transmits a diet of anti-American, anti-US-government, pro-Trump, anti-Ukraine (no surprise there) propaganda, almost 24/7. In fact, even the RT presenters (mostly British, Irish and American) were dutifully chuckling over the ‘endorsement’.

    RT also broadcasts interesting documentaries, though those about the US usually focus on the plight of African-Americans and the poorer echelons of American society, when not spotlighting the evils of colonialism and its legacy (somehow forgetting Russia is attempting to reinvigorate its lost empire and expand into large swathes of Africa).

    I imagine if RT were out of lockstep with the great dictator, the station would be banned and its employees lounging in a gulag.

    * ‘having us on’ – British term meaning ‘telling us fibs to get a reaction’

    Thanks for the read.

    Reply
    • Mike Bryant says:
      2 years ago

      Interesting take, Paul. It seems to me that world leaders are simply following the golden example of the neocons and warmongers right here in the good old USA. War is quite profitable for everyone except the dying. It seems to me that Putin and Xi are simply elbowing their way into the arms markets that NATO has controlled for years.
      I wonder if Dick Cheney is ‘having us on’ as well.

      Reply
      • Joseph S. Salemi says:
        2 years ago

        Dick Cheney and his obnoxious wife never met a war they didn’t like, and if they couldn’t find one they started one. They make John Bolton look like Gandhi. When both of them endorsed the Laughing Cow Harris, everything that rightists have been saying about neocon “RINOs” was verified.

        Reply
    • Mike Bryant says:
      2 years ago

      Paul, RT.com is not censored by US Homeland Security. They even have live news.

      Our Homeland Security mostly just censors patriots and Christians.

      Reply
  10. yohanna says:
    2 years ago

    Ms. Harris I strongly support
    Yet, some will most likely retort
    She’s full of foul poopy
    So, Putin, you’re loopy
    Unless you just said that for sport

    🙂

    Reply
    • Susan Jarvis Bryant says:
      2 years ago

      Thank you, Yohanna. I laugh-out-loud love it!

      Reply
    • Joseph S. Salemi says:
      2 years ago

      Vote for The Cow if you must,
      If you think she’s a person to trust —
      But once she’s elected
      You won’t be protected,
      And your savings account will go bust.

      Reply
      • Susan Jarvis Bryant says:
        2 years ago

        I agree wholeheartedly, Joe. Ms. Harris won’t be getting my vote:

        This queen of the nuttiest titter
        Will leave her sheep bloody and bitter–
        Each crass, tacky cackle
        Conceals a sly jackal
        That’s growling behind all the glitter.

        Reply
      • yohanna says:
        2 years ago

        🙂 🙂 🙂 Great limerick!

        Pray that never happens!!

        Reply
  11. yohanna says:
    2 years ago

    You’re most welcome–so glad you enjoyed it. I so enjoy your extraordinary work!

    Reply
    • Susan Jarvis Bryant says:
      2 years ago

      Thank you for your limerick and for your appreciation.

      Reply
  12. Adam Wasem says:
    2 years ago

    Great rollicking fun, Susan, as always. It must be hard for the corporate spin doctors, for all the Democrats of integrity to be flocking to Trump, and for Kamala to be the butt of so many memeable jokes. I have one suggestion–change “disputing” in line 1 to “disputin,'” immediately setting the comic tone and bettering the internal rhyme with “Putin.” Other than that, keep up the dazzling work.

    Reply
    • Susan Jarvis Bryant says:
      2 years ago

      Adam, thank you for your spot-on comment and your fine eye – I thoroughly appreciate both!

      Reply

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