Poor Minnesota
Normal people have an issue
recreating Mogadishu,
while destroying each iota
of what once was Minnesota.
Minnesota paid out millions
to a small group of civilians
with Somali shared traditions,
and with fraudulent ambitions.
When Tim Walz first heard about it,
he did more than merely doubt it.
He denounced the Whistleblowers
as abhorrent hatred-sowers.
Fraud had long since been suspected,
but was finally detected
by a Democrat supporter,
AKA a news reporter.
Now that fraud has been reported,
we need all those caught deported.
They despise the land that freed them,
and bite off the hands that feed them.
Sure, it’s mean to use “retarded”
to brand Walz, who left unguarded
all the cash in his state’s wallet,
but what else is there to call it?
With this third-world fraud now busted,
we know which state can’t be trusted.
Why should we fund one more penny?
With Walz there, why send them any?
Poet’s Note
A group calling itself Minnesota Staff Fraud Reporting Commentary, which claims to represent over 400 employees of the Minnesota Department of Human Services, has made many posts on X, including the one excerpted below:
“Tim Walz is 100% responsible for massive fraud in Minnesota,” the group said in a November 29 post referencing a New York Times article on the crimes. “We let Tim Walz know of fraud early on, hoping for a partnership in stopping fraud, but no, we got the opposite response.”
They added, “Tim Walz systematically retaliated against whistleblowers using monitoring, threats, repression, and did his best to discredit fraud reports. Instead of partnership, we got the full weight of retaliation by Tim Walz, certain DFL members, and an indifferent mainstream media. It’s scary, isolating, and left us wondering who we can turn to.”
Warren Bonham is a private equity investor who lives in Southlake, Texas.
…but, fide “News from Lake Wobegon,” Minnesota is considered the most advanced of the Unruly States.
Lake Wobegoners proved they’re not that good at math with their assertion that all of their children are above average.
Now I understand why that laughing hyaena Kamala Harris wanted Walz as her running mate. Birds of a feather flock together.
They were perfectly paired. We, like Trump, really dodged a bullet
Warren, great poem on the fraud scandal with hoped for repercussions.
Don’t’ laugh at me, but maybe this will be the time that we’ll finally see true accountability.
Great reporting, Warren, with lots of smile-producing rhymes!
Thank you so much for reading and commenting. I’m glad you found it amusing!
Rollicking and entertaining from start to finish. Remember when Pelosi claimed that immigrants were needed to pick the fruit? Instead, they came to pick our pockets! I used to associate Minnesota with Finns, Swedes, lumberjacks, hunters, and fishermen. It’s going to take a long time for the state to disassociate itself from what’s been exposed as one of — if not the — largest frauds ever!
I’ve tried hard to forget Pelosi. I like the way you twisted her comment and made it more realistic!
One of your best, Warren. I agree with Cynthoa on the rhy.es. Those in the 1zt 4train are especially clever.
Maybe someone should do a longer poem on iner alia how we came to have Walz asa gov and may yet have to worry about his or copy’s further misdoings. Sorry and almost unbelievable developments.
Thanks so much! I was hoping no one else would notice, but I do agree that the first quatrain is the best one.
Your usual perfect meter, Warren, in these 28 lines perfectly balanced with perfect double rhymes. You make it look as easy as surreptitiously collecting bribes. The effect is an outstanding method of lightening up biting satire and making it look as normal as perpetrators of the corruption had hoped their thievery would be.
Thank you for the very gracious comments! You perfectly summed up the effect I was aiming for.
Warren , as a Minnesota native, I no longer recognize my home state. I prefer to remember the great Northern woods and glacier lakes of the boreal region where I was born, the beauty of nature and the simplicity of childhood. The original culture of millenia . I wonder if the walleye and Northern pike still swim those waters.
It’s amazing how long it takes to build something up, and quickly they can be torn down. I hope your home state isn’t past the point of no return, but it will be hard to come back from this.
Shall we now call it the Land of a Thousand Fakes? Tampon Tim has got some ‘splainin’ to do, and lucky for him lyin’ is second nature. Somehow he’ll try to make it all Trump’s fault.
The finger pointing has already begun. We never seem to get accountability. There is always some crazy judge, or other flaw in our system of justice, that prevents this from happening